[A+] [A-]

Fatwas Regarding Women

In the Name of Allâh, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful

Questions Related to Being Dutiful to One's Parents

That Prayer is Not Accepted

Question: I fast voluntary fasts so that Allah may wipe away my mistakes and errors that I have committed without any knowledge on my part. I stick to my religion, and all praises are due to Allah. However, my mother asks Allah not to accept my fasts. This is not due to any reason. My fasting does not affect my housework and she is not in need of me. I am very confused and dumbfounded that Allah may not accept my deeds and my fasting because the supplications of the parents is accepted by Allah. What is your opinion?

Response: We thank you for your concern for the acts of worship and voluntary deeds. Continue to perform those acts according to your ability. Excuse your mother. For the deeds you are doing are good deeds and the rights of your mother are more so met by you doing so. Fasting does not interfere with you being obedient to her, serving her and fulfilling her rights. In fact, she must encourage you to do such and she should take you as an example as she is in more need of voluntary prayers, fasting and acts of worship to raise her level and remove her sins. As for her supplication against you, it is not acceptable, Allah willing, especially since the deed you are doing is a good one and she only desires by that mercy and pity.

Shaikh ibn Jibreen

My Mother Loves Me Dearly and Treats Me Like a Child

Question: My mother loves me very dearly and has a great deal of sympathy for me, perhaps that is due to my weakness and illness. However, her love for me goes well beyond acceptable limits. I am now twenty-one years old yet my mother still treats me like I am a girl of ten. If she is able to, she feeds me by her hand. I, all praises due to Allah, am very soft in speech with her and obey her.

Response: Usually the parent loves his or her children and feels compassion for them. This effect may be much more in both or one of the parents due to no reason or because the child is so dutiful and obedient to them or due to some illness or weakness that makes them even more merciful to their weak child. The effect of this compassion may even harm the child, as in the question. The child should excuse herself to the mother or father due the harm they cause. She should make it clear that there is no need for such protection and care. Furthermore, the parents must be equitable toward all their children with respect to love, compassion and caring. In fact, some of the early Muslims used to be equal with respect to kissing their children in a valiant attempt to fulfill the command of justice mentioned by the Prophet (peace be upon him)

"Fear Allah and be just among your children."1

Shaikh ibn Jibreen


1. Recorded by al-Bukhari and Muslim.--JZ

My Mother Died While She Was Angry with Me

Question: My mother died about six years ago during Ramadhan. When I was young, I was always arguing with her and talking back to her. When she died, she was angry with me. I became older and more mature and now I am remorseful about what happened between me and her. I cannot do anything now except ask for forgiveness and repent to Allah and pray for mercy for her and forgiveness. Is this sufficient to have Allah forgive my sin and have mercy on me for that deed on the Day that we meet?

Second, we do not fast on her behalf.1 Are we being sinful? Is it allowed for us to fast on her behalf afterwards even though we were not aware of that matter except recently?

Response: Perhaps during the lifetime of your mother you were very young and, at the same time, ignorant and childish. You are excused for what you did during that time. Furthermore, since you are full of remorse after you have become more mature and you have repented to Allah and sought His forgiveness for that sin, Allah willing, that has erased what has occurred. Repentance wipes away what preceded it. Also, the acts of praying for her, asking for mercy and forgiveness for her, charity on her behalf and so forth all are means by which Allah wipes away sins. As for the fasting that she did not do and her breaking of her fast during the days of her illness, she is excused due to her illness that she was suffering and she did not have the ability to make up those days later.

Shaikh ibn Jibreen


1. It seems that there is something missing in the text of this question. Apparently, the mother became ill and was not able to fast and her children did not make up those days on her behalf. Allah knows best.-JZ

Back to Index

print this page bookmark this page

preloaded image preloaded image preloaded image preloaded image preloaded image